Water is life. Revive. Renourish. Reconnect.
I am triggered. I feel scattered. I am positive that there is no amount of uphill climbing that will be enough. As we ascend the path uphill from the Ritual Hall, I want to run. I want to scream. I am not feeling considerate. Fire is running through me. We reach a rotted wooden platform – it feels unsafe to work ritual here. We turn around and head back down the path. There are uphill openings between the trees on my left as we descend the trail. I want to walk through them but we are doing group activity. I am fully aware of the selfishness I feel right now.
We are here to create a ritual together, the four of us, to end in a place where we feel revived, renourished, and reconnected. I already know the only chance I have to get closer to that sort of heart space is to lead a trance. Trance workings always seem to sort me out and bring me fully present to the magic. We divy up roles among us. The circle is cast. We call in leeches, cockroaches, dark mermaids, crocodiles, and the like. I feel better already as these are my long time accomplices in magic.
This is the first ritual we’ve done outside all week. My breath feels bigger. My toes dig into the cold wet earth, scrunching leaves and mud. I feel grounded, connected, and in my power. I begin the trance. I am taking our group to a sacred place, down an ancient path, where we are to meet a spirit being, a being of this land.
I pause for ten breaths as we meet our being, allowing everyone, including myself the time we need here, the time to meet our being and the time to ask questions.
With my eyes closed, a natural pool of blue water appears in front of me, banked by white sand on all sides. A lizard man stands hip deep in the cool water, staring back at me. His head titls side to side as he inspects me. He is curious about me. I ask him if he has any message for me. He clicks at me, smacking lizard lips, coming to to a stop open-mouthed. I understand nothing and am alright with at least having met a spirit of the land. It is time to say goodbye. I thank him and feel two ideas push their way into my awareness: courage and curiosity. There is my message. I walk the path home from this trance journey feeling revived, renourished, and reconnected.
How will I carry curiosity and courage forward?